Thursday 5 July 2012

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Wednesday 11 August 2010

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Tuesday 23 February 2010

In a brief conversation, a man asked a woman he was pursuing the question “What kind of man are you looking for?” She sat quietly for a moment before looking him in the eye and asking, “Do you really want to know?” Reluctantly, he said, “Yes.”

She began to expound… “As a woman in this day and age, I am in a position to ask a man what he can do for me that I can’t do for myself. I pay my own bills. I take care of my household without the help of any man…or woman for that matter. I am in the position to ask, ‘What can you bring to the table?’”

The man looked at her. Clearly he thought that she was referring to money.

She quickly corrected his thought and stated, “I am not referring to money, I need something more. I need a man who is striving for perfection in every aspect of life.”

He sat back in his chair, folded his arms, and asked her to explain.

She said, “I am looking for someone who is striving for perfection mentally because I need conversation and mental stimulation. I don’t need a simple-minded man. I am looking for someone who is striving for perfection spiritually because I don’t need to be unequally yoked… believers mixed with unbelievers is a recipe for disaster.

I need a man who is striving for perfection financially because I don’t need a financial burden. I am looking for someone who is sensitive enough to understand what I go through as a woman, but strong enough to keep me grounded. I am looking for someone who I can respect In order to be submissive, I must respect him. I cannot be submissive to a man who isn’t taking care of his business. I have no problem being submissive…he just has to be worthy. God made woman to be a helpmate for man. I can’t help a man if he can’t help himself.”

When she finished her spill, she looked at him. He sat there with a puzzled look on his face. He said, ‘You are asking a lot.

She replied, “I’m worth a lot.”

Saturday 20 February 2010

CHILDREN FIRST

Loving Father, thank You for loving me beyond measure.

Lord teach me how to put my children's need before mine. I love my daughters, I cannot live without them. Help me give them the right needs, the correct attention that they need, help oh Jesus to have them as my first priority. Help me to become a better mother. May they grow in my love, in my my heart always. Help me keep them safe. teach me your ways of love. May I be a unselfish mother who will put the children's need before mine. May i discipline them in a way that they will not be afraid of me but respect me.
Sending you my love
with words spoken true
From the depths of my heart
I send them to you

Like petals of a rose
is the touch of your face
I can feel it every time
we're wrapped in embrace
The taste of your lips
is like sweet dripping honey
Feels like butterflies swirlin'
inside of my tummy

The warmth of your touch
is like a torch of fire
The tingling inside
makes me burn with desire
So I just wanna say
my love for you is true
Along with these words
I wanna say "I Love You

Friday 19 February 2010

Remove The Lies In Your Mind

You have lies in your mind.

These lies have stolen much of your joy and blessings.

Here’s the problem: You don’t know they’re lies.

My friend priest told me this hilarious story.

One day, a priest saw a group of kids surrounding a dog.

Curious, he came over and asked, “What are you doing?”

One kid said, “Father, we’re arguing as to who would own this stray dog. We all want him. So we decided that the one who can say the biggest lie would take home the dog.”

The priest shook his head and said, “That’s wrong! Do you know that lying is bad? It’s against the commandments of God. Do you know that when I was your age, I never told a single lie?”

For a moment, there was silence. All the kids looked very sad. The priest was happy. He felt his message hit home.

Finally, the smallest boy said, “Okay, no one can beat that. Give him the dog.”

The First Lie I Ever Told

I remember the first lies I ever said.

I was in Grade 3.

One day, I opened the classroom door, not knowing my classmate was right behind it. The door hit his forehead, and blood flowed down his face, all the way to his white polo uniform. He looked like a victim in a horror movie.

That was when my teacher arrived on the scene. And she screamed, “Who did this?”

There I was, still holding the door knob, and with a shaking voice, said, “Not me!”

I remember how terrible I felt that day.

If you ever told a lie before, you know the feeling.

Suddenly, you don’t feel at peace. (Obviously, I’m disqualifying chronic liars. They’ve deadened their conscience and feel nothing.)

Let me tell you why we lose our peace.

Because God is truth. And when we speak untruth, we move away from God. You move away from the one who said, “Peace be with you.”

Lying isn’t worth it.

Inner peace leaves you.

And your relationships are affected. Because relationships are based on trust—which is based on truth. More so, you can’t even have a great relationship with yourself because you lose respect for yourself.

But let me talk about a different kind of lying.

When We Lie To Ourselves

One day, I was preaching about the power of our words.

I asked my audience to say out loud, “I’m beautiful!” We laughed and had so much fun.

After the talk, I saw a young woman waiting for me at the foot of the stage.

I noticed that physically, she was stunningly beautiful.

She had lovely eyes, but when I looked at them, I sensed deep sadness.

She asked me, “Brother Bo, if one says, ‘I’m beautiful’,but she feels ugly, isn’t she lying?”

I already knew she was talking about herself. I asked, “Why do you think you’re ugly?”

She told me her story. When she was a little child, her father would tell her, “Dorothy, you’re ugly.” And he’d laugh the meanest laugh. He’d tease her again and again. Most of the time, he was drunk when he did this. And she said, “Ever since, I’ve always felt ugly. You were telling us on stage to say, ‘I’m beautiful’! I couldn’t say it. I felt I’d be lying…”

I asked her, “Define lying.”

“When I say something that’s not true.”

“We’ve got a problem here. There are three persons involved. You, your father, and God. You say you’re ugly. Your father said you were ugly. But today, I announce to you that God says you’re beautiful. Who is telling the truth? You, your father, or God? Out of these three persons, only one of you claimed, ‘I Am The Truth.’”

She began to break down.

She said, “Bo, you don’t know what kind of life I’m living now. I live an ugly life. I’ve had 7 boyfriends, some of them married men. I’ve given away my body to all 7 of them and I feel so dirty. I am ugly.”

I knew what happened to Dorothy.

Words have power. And she allowed the words of her father to create ugliness in her life. She was jumping from one lover to another, searching for someone to tell her that she was beautiful.

I said, “Dorothy, God says you’re beautiful. Because He doesn’t look at your mistakes. He doesn’t look at your past. He only looks at the original beauty He created in you from the very beginning. And He also looks at the glorious beauty of your future.”

I have this habit of praying for people on the spot. I prayed for God’s healing on her life. I said, “Lord, dethrone this cruel lie in her mind.”

The next time I saw Dorothy, she was a different person.

She was free from all her bad relationships. She was serving God in her prayer group. And her eyes no longer had sadness. I saw happiness in them. And yes, she was indeed beautiful.

Stop The Lies

You may be like Dorothy today.

You feel you’ve made mistakes in the past. And you believe you’re a bad person. Or you failed in your school or job or family—and feel that you’re a failure.

But I speak words of truth to you: God says you’re not a bad person. God says you’re not a failure. Sure you’ve made mistakes. But those mistakes don’t define you. God says you’re very good, made in His image. God says there’s a champion in you.

Dethrone the lies in your mind.

Listen to what God is saying instead.

My friend George Gabriel told me that in Facebook and other social networks, there’s such a thing as “Status”. Most often, he sees people type in negative words like, “I feel lazy today,” and “I’m depressed,” and “I’m broke.” He says that these negative words are typed in the internet forever.

Hey, it’s good that we’re being emotionally honest. That’s important. Don’t deny what you feel. But I think we shouldn’t stop at emotional honesty. I think we should also proclaim the truth.

If you feel sick, don’t just say, “I don’t feel well.” Say, “I don’t feel well but this is temporary. Health and healing are flowing into my body.”

If you don’t have money today, don’t say, “I’m poor.” Say, “I’m temporarily broke. Abundance is coming my way.”

If you had a relationship that didn’t work out, don’t just say, “I have a broken heart.” Say, “I have a broken heart but I know the best is yet to come. Someone better will walk into my life and I will find my one true love.”

My friend Vic Espanol told me of Dr. Masaru Emoto. I read his fascinating work years ago, but reading it again opened my eyes to the power of our words…

The Power Of Words Over Water

Can water be affected by our words?

Dr. Masaru Emoto, a Japanese scientist, believes so.

And he has proof.


Dr. Emoto took water droplets, exposed them to various words, music, and environments, and froze them for three hours. He then examined the crystal formations under a dark field microscope. And he took photographs.

The results were totally mind-blowing.

Here’s a photo of ordinary water without any prayer spoken over it. The molecular structure is in disarray.

The photo below is water after the prayer was said. It’s simply breathtaking. (I now have a great respect for praying before meals! More on this later.)

Dr. Emoto also exposed water to Heavy Metal music. Here’s how it looks like. Looks sad if you ask me.

Here’s water exposed to classical music and folk dance music. Looks much better, right?

Next, Dr. Emoto stuck a piece of paper with these words: “You make me sick. I will kill you.” Here’s how the frozen water droplets looks like under the microscope…

Below is how water looked like with the words “Love” over it. The difference is amazing.

This is Polluted water…

This is water from Lourdes, France. Utterly beautiful, right?

Wait A Minute—

Aren’t You Made Up Of Water?

Yes! 72% of your body is made up of water.

Imagine how your words affect your own body.

When you say, “I’m a failure,” or “I’m hopeless,” or “I won’t get well,” imagine how these words weaken your health.

Make a choice to say the best words out there. Say often, “I’m wonderful,” and “I’m beautiful,” and “I’m God’s child,” and “God has a great plan for my life!”

It’s not only water.

Dr. Emoto also experimented with cooked rice.

He placed one cup of cooked rice in two airtight jars. On one jar, he wrote, “I love you,” and on the other, “You fool.” Everyday for 30 days, Dr. Emoto would say these words to each jar of rice.

After 30 days, the “I love you” rice was still white. But the “You fool” rice was so rotten, it was black. How can you explain this?

Just as a side note: When I was a child, my mother taught me to pray before meals. Now I realize it wasn’t just a nice thing to do. When I pray over my meal, I know a material transformation takes place in the molecular level of the food that I pray for. I say, “Be blessed,” to the water and food on the table—and I expect it to be blessed.

Can Water Read Or Listen To Words?

Yes and No.

Let me explain this in the simplest way I can.

I’m taking a deep breath now, because I can’t believe I’m going to do this: I’m going to give a mini-lecture on Physics. Me, the guy who got a D in all my science subjects!

Do you remember Albert Einstein?

My friend Albert said that everything is energy.

Remember his formula E=mc2?

Well, he believed that energy and matter are interchangeable. Because in a subatomic level, the most solid matter you can think of, like a table or a rock (or my biceps) isn’t really solid at all. Everything is a sea of vibrating energy. Ever changing, ever moving, at the speed of light. Thus, in a mind-boggling way, there’s really no difference between a thing and a thought. All is energy.

Because of this, everything is interconnected. We’re all inside this ocean of fluid energy. That means my thoughts and words can really affect the entire material universe.

Amazing? You bet.

When you start speaking like this, people automatically think this is New Age and reject it. Not necessarily. What I gave you are reflections based on the Theory of Relativity and Quantum Physics. (Note: From a scientific perspective, I probably will get an F with my explanation above. I apologize to all the scientists out there.)

Friend, use your words to create your desired destiny.

Speak Words of Faith. Believe that your words affect your universe.

The Power Of Prayer

I have a confession to make.

For many years, I’ve never understood why we needed “intercession”.

Why do I need to ask you to pray for me?

Let’s say I need money to buy food.

Doesn’t God love me enough to give me money if I ask Him? Why do I need to ask my friends to pray for me?

Is God moved if instead of one person praying, we come as a group? Is God like a politician that is moved by numbers? Is God saying, “Hmmm, you’re only one person praying. Tsk, tsk. Not enough. Come back to me if you’re a crowd, okay?”

Let’s say you’re sick and want healing.

Why ask the saints to pray for you? Doesn’t God love you enough to heal you—without the backing of saints? Palakasan ba ‘to? Is God saying, “Don’t you bring References with you?”

I also couldn’t understand “Soaking Prayer”. Someone told me, “Our mother was sick and we soaked her in prayer for two whole hours. And God healed her!”

At the back of my mind, I asked, “Why? Why two hours? Doesn’t God hear us the first time we ask for healing? Is He that type of God who will wait if we’re really insistent—and then relent to our pleading?

If so, then God is a capricious God who doles out blessings to the strongest, loudest appeals.

But as I reflected further, I began to understand.

This understanding was a giant breakthrough for me.

The Blessings Are Already Given

I believe God has already made available all the blessings that you need. Healing. Miracles. Abundance. They’re all there. The Bible says that (Ephesians 1).

He’s not hiding any of that from us.

He’s not keeping it in a giant storehouse under lock and key, and giving them out piece by piece whenever we ask for them.

I repeat: He’s made them all available to you.

Imagine yourself swimming in an ocean of blessings. That’s the picture!

But here’s the reality: One person can be a sponge. And another person can be a rock. The sponge absorbs the water, the rock cannot.

What makes you more absorbent? Your faith.

That’s why prayer has a powerful effect. It increases your faith. It makes you ready to receive blessings.

And when others pray for you, their faith increases your faith. No mater how far they are, their words travel at the speed of light and bless you. Something happens to you when others proclaim blessing to you. (And note: Love is the greatest power on the planet. When I pray for you, I’m loving you with God’s love. You receive this love. And this love heals and performs miracles.)

That’s why Intercession is powerful. That’s why soaking prayer is powerful. The problem isn’t in the giving of the blessing. The problem is in the receiving of the blessing. Many times, we’re not yet ready. Our faith isn’t ready. (Another note: Faith isn’t only the reason why we don’t receive blessings. There are other reasons that I don’t have time to talk about today.)

But being surrounded by the prayer and love of others, we increase our faith and receive His blessings.

And when you speak words of truth, you affect the universe.

Let me end with one last story.

Who Is Telling The Truth?

One day, a young guy and a young girl fell in love.

But the guy came from a poor family. The girl’s parents weren’t too happy.

So the young man decided not only to court the girl but to court her parents as well. In time, the parents saw that he was a good man and was worthy of their daughter’s hand.

But there was another problem: The man was a soldier. Soon, war broke out and he was being sent overseas for a year.

The week before he left, the man knelt on his knee and asked his lady love, “Will you marry me?” She wiped a tear, said yes, and they were engaged. They agreed that when he got back in one year, they would get married.

But tragedy struck. A few days after he left, the girl had a major vehicular accident. It was a head-on collision.

When she woke up in the hospital, she saw her father and mother crying. Immediately, she knew there was something wrong.

She later found out that she suffered brain injury. The part of her brain that controlled her face muscles was damaged. Her once lovely face was now disfigured. She cried as she saw herself in the mirror. “Yesterday, I was beautiful. Today, I’m a monster.” Her body was also covered with so many ugly wounds.

Right there and then, she decided to release her fiancé from their promise. She knew he wouldn’t want her anymore. She would forget about him and never see him again.

For one year, the soldier wrote many letters—but she wouldn’t answer. He phoned her many times but she wouldn’t return her calls.

But after one year, the mother walked into her room and announced, “He’s back from the war.”

The girl shouted, “No! Please don’t tell him about me. Don’t tell him I’m here!”

The mother said, “He’s getting married,” and handed her a wedding invitation.

The girl’s heart sank. She knew she still loved him—but she had to forget him now.

With great sadness, she opened the wedding invitation.

And then she saw her name on it!

Confused, she asked, “What is this?”

That was when the young man entered her room with a bouquet of flowers. He knelt beside her and asked, “Will you marry me?”

The girl covered her face with her hands and said, “I’m ugly!”

The man said, “Without your permission, your mother sent me your photos. When I saw your photos, I realized that nothing has changed. You’re still the person I fell in love. You’re still as beautiful as ever. Because I love you!”

This Story Is A Parable Of Your Life

Friend, the girl believed she was ugly.

The man believed she was beautiful.

Who is telling the truth?

Simple answer: The man who loved.

You may be like that woman. You feel you’re disfigured by your failures. Marred by your mistakes. You feel you live an ugly life. But God says you’re beautiful! Because He loves you.

He doesn’t look at your mistakes. He doesn’t look at your past. He looks at the original beauty He created in you—and the glorious beauty of your future.

I encourage you to speak words of truth.

Dethrone the lies in your mind.

Say, “I’m beautiful.” Say, “I’m a wonderful person.” Say, “I have a great future.” Say, “I’m anointed. I’m strong. I’m blessed.”

Use your words to create your desired reality.

May your dreams come true,

Bo Sanchez

Tuesday 2 February 2010

USE YOUR WORDS TO BLESS OTHERS

Read Bo Sanchez article here

My Notes:

Use your words it's the most powerful thing you have in this lifetime. You have the power to curse your own life and another or use your power to create blessings into your life and to another. Words are the most powerful tool we human have. Even the smallest curse that comes out of your mouth will be sent to the universe and it will reflect on your life. Believe it is true. words aren’t just meaningless sounds. Words aren’t just noise. Words have creative power. Words define our reality.

You can shape the destiny of your children, of your friends, of your loved ones by your words.

Here’s what I learned: People will rise to the level of what you prophesy. People will adjust to your prophecy.

Remember, if you don’t tell your kids who they are and what their destiny is, someone else will.


Here's my own story: As you all know I never grew up having my parents around I have my grandmother. Well she isn't verbal at all. When She tells me something she always scold me. I do Everything here at home, like wash the dishes take care of my kids do the laundry and clean the house. I do this because I love her, She's 66 yrs. old and I don't want her to do heavy jobs around the house anymore. I do this because I love doing it. I do this because I love my kids, I love it when I give them a bath, even though I always end up more wet than they do, or I love feeding them although it takes like 48 years for them to finish. I do this because I love it mostly because I love my family. I do admit that this has a really harsh effect on me when my mommy (Grandmother) only sees the negative sides. Well what I learned to do reading and studying Bo's words, is that I learned to pray forher instead of getting affected on her words. I learned that if I keep praying for her, that God will touch her heart, I know someday she will be touched by God and will be proud of what I have been through and who I am now because of those things. I know she will acknowledge that I am a good mother to my kids and I am a good grand daughter. I pray it with all my heart. My silence will bless her. because every time she says something negative to me, i just keep my silence and pray.


WORLD OF BLESSINGS

Today i recieve massive job offers, and home based. really exciting. tomorrow someone from australia will call me to do a phone interview. He offered me a virtual assistant job of date entry. Another was also home based. God provides surely. What I need now is an internet connection and a PC hehehe. I believe God will provide that as well. More blessings to come. Weeeh.

Monday 1 February 2010

BO SANCHEZ FREE E-BOOK

GET YOUR COPY HERE http://bosanchez.ph

MY NOTES.

HOW TO KNOW IF YOUR DREAMS ARE GOD'S DREAM.

The Three Powerful Secrets
Behind
All Successes in Life


* Desire
You need to want your dream from the depths of your
soul. How intensely do you desire your dream? How
deeply do you want it to happen? Many people don’t
achieve their dreams because they don’t want it bad enough.

* Belief
Belief is nothing else but a feeling of certainty. The more
certain you feel that you can accomplish your dream, the
faster you can make them a reality. Many people don’t
achieve their dreams because in their heart of hearts, they
doubt they can really do it.

* Action
Albert Einstein said, “Nothing happens unless something
moves.” Successful people aren’t the most knowledgeable
people on earth. But you can be totally sure that all of
them have a bias for action. Many people don’t achieve
their dreams because they know but they don’t act.

Here’s a problem: Many of us are not successful because we
don’t know our deepest desires.
Power Quote:
Many people get bogged down on the “How” without
understanding that if the “Why” is big enough, the right
“How” will come to you.


he 4 Signs of a Soul Dream

Sign #1
The Dream Is Connected
to Your Most Important Values

Sign #2
The Dream Must Bring You
Closer to God


Sign #3
The Dream Must Be
Connected to
Your Life Purpose and Core
Gifts


Sign #4
The Dream Must Make
You Happy
in the Deepest Way Possible


Some of Your Dreams Are Too
Small—
Enlarge Them!

Here are two secrets I’d like to share with you about Big
Dreams.
First, Big Dreams are more exciting. That’s pretty obvious.
Second, Big Dreams attract more resources from God’s
universe.

I believe that when we fulfil our Divine destiny, all of creation
conspires to bless us, assist us, equip us, and provide for us.
This has been my experience.
Focus on Soul Dreams — and the bigger the better. Stretch!
Expand! And believe that this is the reason why you were born.

And everything you need will come rolling down at your feet in
submission.
Opportunities. Friends. Connections. Wisdom. Money.
They will come.
Why?
Because Soul Dreams are connected to your Life Purpose.



Your Core Gifts and Passions
Will Lead You to Your Life Purpose


Discovering your life purpose doesn’t have to be rocket
science.
It’s really very simple.
You don’t need to read a hundred books to discover it.
You don’t need 10 years of navel-gazing and meditation to
find it.
You don’t need to fly around the world to get it.
Just ask yourself two simple questions: Passion and Potential
l Passion: What do you enjoy doing?
l Potential: And what do you do well?
That’s it!
That’s how God wants you to bless the world.


Start Writing Your
Soul Dreams Now


It’s not enough that you dream.
It’s important to dream the right dreams.
Are some of your dreams no longer exciting to you?
Perhaps a deep part of you has already realized that they
were superficial.
Replace them.
Search the deepest part of who you are.
What great things do you want to happen?
What are your Soul Dreams?
How will you fulfil your Life Purpose this year?
Don’t limit yourself.
Don’t say, “It’s impossible.”
It becomes impossible only when you say it is.
Everything is possible to those who believe.



May your dreams come true,


Bo Sanchez



Bo Sanchez articles about relationship are now copied to my blog for my own benefit if you wanna read more please log in to Bo Sanchez' blog at bosanchez.ph. You'll have more to read there. So I hope I gave you a head start. Keep reading his blog or even subscribe to his weekly soulfood it'll do you so much good. hehehe.

RELATIONSHIP REBORN PART 7

CELEBRATION

Happy Relationships Throw More Parties


Are Your Homes Happy?

Here’s my belief. I believe kids will love to go home if there’s love in the home.

Have you heard that great old song from 1964? (For your information, I didn’t hear the original version. I heard this song in a revival in American Idol.)

A chair is still a chair even when there’s no one sitting there. But a chair is not a house, and a house is not a home, when there’s no one there, to hold you tight, and no one there, that you can kiss good night…

Friend, is there happiness in your home?


I’ve noticed that the happiest relationships have a rhythm of celebration. In other words, they throw parties.

I don’t mean a party with balloons and clowns (though that’ll be great too), but putting a “party spirit” in your relationship.

I’ve got four fantastic suggestions.


1. Make The Family Meal A Party

I know of a man who has 11 children.

When he goes home from work, he does a very important ritual before entering his front door. He mentally unloads all his problems at the front porch. Because his kids need a happy Dad.

When he enters the door, he shouts, “Hi kids!” And 11 kids rush to him to give him a hug. He then wrestles them on the floor and they play together.

And when mealtime comes, he makes everyone laugh. He inspires everyone with his stories.

Alas, the typical family meal isn’t like this.


My kids love Family nights.

If they had it their way, it’ll be done every night.

Sometimes, we watch a movie at home, with a barrel of popcorn. (According to my son Benedict, a movie without popcorn is a horrific crime.)

Sometimes, we play games together. Monopoly, Charades, Pictionary, and Trivia.

Sometimes, we all play video games together. Obviously, the kids always win and the parents lose. But that’s okay. Instead of banning video games from our kids, we enter into their digital worlds. Doing so makes us able to guide them against violent games.

Sometimes, we go to a bookstore and eat ice cream.

I believe the weekly Family Night is a mini-party that you should never miss. Believe me, when you’re old and grey (or old and bald), you’ll look back at these times and thank God you had them!



3. Weekly Dates With Each Family Member


Pick a day for each family member to spend quality time with. Like Mondays are for kids where you go to a park or restuarant and eat your favorite meals. Or fridays are spent with your wife or husband, these times should be nonnegotiable, meaning there can't be anything to change these plans unless it is emergency.

4. Annual Family Celebrations

Create your own Family’s “Liturgical Calendar”.

Sit down and block off the most important dates of the year.

For example, plan everyone’s birthdays.


3 Ingredients For Throwing Parties


Ingredient #1:

Gratitude


Here’s the truth: Celebrating your relationships doesn’t depend on having a bubbly or cheerful personality. It depends on your depth of gratitude.

You throw a party because you’re grateful to the person for being there in your life.

If you believe that the people in your life are your greatest gifts from God, then you throw parties often to thank them.

Even if we know it’s a lot of hard work.


Ingredient #2:

Hard Work

Have you ever prepared for a birthday party before?

It’s always hard work.

But who said love isn’t hard work? As I said before, love is about dirty hands, not just beating hearts.

Finally, the third ingredient is very important too.



Ingredient #3:

Creativity

Throwing parties requires some creativity.

Do you want to be more creative?

Copy. Get inspiration from others. It’s the secret of the greatest artists in the world: Leonardo de Vinci, Michelangelo, Picasso, Rembrandt, Bo Sanchez, etc…

You don’t know how to express your love in a playful way?

Ask others what they do. Do some research.

Through the years, I’ve given many cards to my wife. Let me share with you two of them today. You’ll notice that I’m not very original. I stole all these from various sources…

Card #1


I framed this card. I basically got the text from an email I received. Probably Spam. Not much originality. But she loved it so much, it’s still on her bedside table after all these years.

My Dearest Valentine,

You are the… apple of my eye, mango of my pie, palaman of my tinapay, keso of my monay, teeth of my suklay, fingers on my kamay, blood in my atay, sala of my bahay, foundation of my tulay, seeds of my palay, best clothes in my ukay-ukay, calcium in my kalansay, calamansi on my siomai, knot on my tie, toyo on my kuchay, vitamins in my gulay, stars of my sky, sand of my Boracay, beauty of my Brunei, highlands of my Tagaytay, mole on my Ate Guy, baba of my Ai-Ai, spinach of my Popeye, sizzle when I fry, wind when I paypay, tungkod when I’m pilay, feeling when I’m high, shoulder when I cry, wings when I fly, prize when I vie, cure to my “ARAY!”, my honey even after I die…

From your one and only,

HAPPY VALENTAY!


Card #2

Here’s my final example.

Again, I stole the photos from the internet too, but I edited the text to fit my purpose.

A PSYCHOLOGY TEST TO MEASURE LOVE

It has already been proven that someone in love has a keener sense of observation. His mind is more alert, his perception more accurate. Doctors suggest that this is so because heightened emotions of love cause blood circulation to flow more freely in the right hemisphere of the brain. Today, you will be shown a photo of two almost identical dolphins. Here’s the test: You can now measure whether a person is in love by the number of slight differences he sees between the two dolphins. The more differences you see, the more in love you are. Turn this paper now and count the many differences you can see between the two dolphins—and find out how in love you really are…

(By the way, I took the test and realized how insanely I’m in love with you. Love, your husband.)

Let me end with the story of prodigal son.

When the “bad” son came home, his father threw a party. The son wanted to beg for forgiveness, but the father wasn’t even listening. Instead, he said, ‘Hurry! Bring the best robe and put it on him. Put a ring on his finger and shoes on his feet. Then go and get the prize calf and kill it, and let us celebrate with a feast!

God loves parties.

And God loves to throw a party to people who don’t deserve a party. If you’re reading this, thinking of your sins, wondering if God still loves you, let tell you: God is throwing a party of love for you right now. He loves you more than you can imagine.

Receive His love today.

And learn to throw more parties in your life.

Your relationships need them badly.

May your dreams come true,

Bo Sanchez






Saturday 30 January 2010

REALTIONSHIP REBORN PART 6

SELF LOVE

Do You Want Happy Relationships? Love Yourself.

Here’s my big message today: You can only have happy relationships if you have happy self-love.


Your Heart Filled With Either

Self-Love Or Neediness


Imagine your heart to be an empty bottle.

But it’s not really empty. It’s actually filled with air.

In the same way, when a human heart doesn’t have self-love, it isn’t empty. It’s filled with neediness.

The air in the bottle is a symbol of neediness.

But if you pour water in it, it pushes air out of the bottle. The more water it has, the less air it has.

That water is self-love.

I believe the only solution to neediness is self-love.

If you learn to love yourself, you’ll push out neediness from your heart. The more you love yourself, the less neediness you have. The less you love yourself, the more neediness you have.

Would you know neediness if you saw it?


Do You Have Neediness?

Neediness, or a lack of self-love, is expressed in so many ways. Here are a few of them…

· Some, like me, become people-pleasers. They’ll be kind, gentle, and smile at everybody so they’ll be liked. Because their substitute for self-love is to be liked.

· Some achieve a lot, get good grades, and do great things. Because their substitute for self-love is to be admired.

· Some rebel, get angry, disobey, and reject everyone. Because they’re substitute to be loved is to receive attention.

· Some become victims of abuse. (Read my example later.)

As I said, I expressed my neediness in the first way—by becoming a good guy. All these years, people thought I was such a loving person. (I fooled you, didn’t I?)

But in reality, I wasn’t giving love; I was buying love.

I wasn’t giving love; I was giving neediness. Because you can only give what is in your heart.

Boy, was I miserable!

Because I lacked self-love, it was impossible to have a healthy, happy, relationship with others.

Let me tell you an extreme example…


The Need To Be Needed


Angela is married to her college sweetheart Marty.

But Marty is an alcoholic.

A few times a month, he comes home very drunk and beats Angela. He gives her a black eye. Slaps on the face. Bruises on the arm.

When he wakes up, he doesn’t even remember what he did.

Marty kneels down before a battered Angela and asks for forgiveness. He’s totally repentant and sobs like a baby.

But one or two weeks after, he gets drunk again and beats her up again. This insanity has been going on for seven years.

Many friends have told Angela to leave Marty. And she has. But Marty would find her and beg her to return. And out of love, she would return home—only to be beaten again.

But is it really out of love?

No. It’s neediness.

Specifically, the need to be needed.

Like me, Angela’s heart is filled with neediness, begging for love. Because she can’t find love, she mistakes being needed as love. And she finds it in her sick husband.

Angela’s neediness attracted Marty’s neediness. Two needy people needing each other. It was the perfect recipe for an unhappy marriage. (I’ll talk more about this later.)

I talked to Angela.

I told her the harsh truth, “You don’t really love her husband.”

“How could you say that?” she said, “That’s why I’ve stuck with him…”

“If you really loved him, and not needed him, you would have run away from him a long time ago and never went near him until he stopped drinking for at least 6 to 12 months. He doesn’t need gentle love. He needs tough love. Are you willing to give that?”

She closed her eyes and wept.


The Problem Of The Needy Heart

Remember this song by Basil Valdez? “It’s your smile, your face, your lips that I miss; your sweet little eyes that stare at me and make me say, I’ll be with you through all the way, ‘Cause it’s you, Who fills the emptiness in me…”

Lovely song. But here’s what I learned about relationships: An empty heart can only give emptiness. And emptiness is another word for neediness.

Have you heard this song by Barry Manilow? “You know I can’t smile without you, I can’t smile without You, I can’t laugh and I can’t sing, I’m findin’ it hard to do anything…”

I’ll be scared if I have a friend who can’t smile without me.

I’ll be scared if I have kids who can’t smile without me.

I’ll be scared if I have a wife who can’t smile without me.

Or have you heard this one by Mariah Carrey? “I can’t live if living is without you, I can’t live, I can’t live anymore…”

Beautiful song. But if you’re looking for a spouse, I strongly urge you to look for someone who can actually live without you—but who will choose to live with you—not because he needs you, but because he loves you.

But this isn’t that easy. Again, I must warn you: Neediness attracts neediness. A needy heart is naturally attracted to another needy heart. The reason is obvious. If you can’t get love, might as well get its counterfeit: neediness.

That’s why some women are jerk magnets. They’re attracted to bad guys because they need to be needed.

The only solution? Replace neediness with self-love.

Because you can only have healthy relationships if you have healthy self-love.


Five Ways Of Filling Your Heart

With Self-Love

Let me share with you the five powerful ways of how to fill your heart with self-love. I’ve tried them. They work marvellously.

Many relationships are suffering right now because of neediness. When you learn to love yourself, your relationships will be freed from neediness. And your relationships with become so much happier.

But I must warn you: Five is a big number. You won’t remember them all. What I want you to do is choose one thing that you believe God wants you to do today. Just one!

Here they are:

1. Believe in your own worthiness

2. Fulfil your dreams

3. Care for your needs

4. Relate with the right God

5. Relate with the right people


Step 1:

Believe In Your Worthiness



Place your hands over your chest and say this out loud, “I’m a wonderful human being. I’m a beautiful person. I’m blessed. I’m equipped. I’m anointed. I’m talented. I’m loved. I’m prosperous. I’m generous. I’m wealthy in every way.”



Step 2:

Fulfil Your Dreams

This actually saved me.

I wasn’t very good with Step 1, “Believe In Your Worthiness”.


Do yourself a big favor. First, know your dreams. Second, go and reach for your dreams.

Why will this bless your relationships? Because once you honor your dreams, you’ll be able to honor the dreams of others too. You’ll encourage people in your life to grow.


Step 3:

Care For Your Needs


Go ahead. Write your own needs on a piece of paper. And see how you can honor them too.

Again, this simple act will bless your relationships because you can now serve people’s needs with a heart full of love, not neediness.



Step 4:

Relate To The Right Image of God


When you change your image of God, your relationships with others will change by leaps and bounds because you become like the God that you worship. If you worship a judgmental god, you’ll be judgmental too. But if you start worshipping a God of great compassion and love, you’ll (slowly) be like Him too.



Step 5:

Relate To The Right People

Remember: Needy people attract needy people.

So be careful with the people who enter into your life.



If you’re not careful, you may end up with an inappropriate number of what many authors call “Emotional Vampires”. These are people who suck out your love and joy. There are many kinds of Emotional Vampires: The Demanding. The arrogant and the self-righteous. The bitter. The unfaithful. The manipulative. Addicts. Parasites. Complainers. Critics.


Now that you’ve read all five actions, pick one.

Not two, or three, or four, or five.

Just one assignment from God for today.

1. Believe in your own worthiness

2. Fulfil your dreams

3. Care for your needs

4. Relate with the right God

5. Relate with the right people



RELATIONSHIP REBORN PART 5

FORGIVENESS

The Only Thing That Can Heal Your Emotional Wounds?

Have you been hurt before?

Have you ever been rejected by others? Ridiculed? Maligned? Gossiped about?

Have you been cheated? Betrayed? Lied to? Stolen from?

If your answer is yes, then I’m writing to the right person.

That means you have emotional wounds, and my big message for you is that there’s only one thing that can heal your wounds.


your emotional wounds are just like physical wounds. Bitterness is like the ingrown—it keeps the original wound alive by puncturing it again and again. So your emotional wound doesn’t heal.



Pressing The Rewind Button Again



do you know what Let past be past means? stop rewinding the past mistakes your loved ones did. Firgiveness is the key.


I Forgive For Selfish Reasons


When You Forgive,

You Bless Your Future


Let me tell you how to forgive…

Stage One: Get Angry

Forgiveness is not a one-stage process.

It’s a two-stage process.

Here they are…

Stage One: Get angry.

Stage Two: Release the anger.

That’s it.

Don’t be shocked, but anger is the first stage of forgiveness.

You have to admit the hurt.

You have to acknowledge the pain.



Stage Two: Release Anger

In Stage Two, you decide to forgive. Key word: Decide.

It’s not about feeling, but about willing. The feelings of anger can linger (that’s normal) but the decision has already been made in your heart.

Remember, Love is a decision, not just a feeling. If forgiveness is love, then forgiveness is a decision too.


But here’s a very important footnote: Forgiveness isn’t necessarily bringing back the relationship to where it was before. If you caught your boyfriend cheating on you, what should you do? Forgive him! But that doesn’t mean you have to get back with him again. That’s all up to you.


Forgiveness is also not opening up yourself to more hurt. For example, if your alcoholic husband beat you up, you still need to forgive him; But do you back into the house? No way. You run away and never see him until he gets counselling and stops drinking for 6 months.


Forgiveness Heals The “Enemy”


When you forgive someone, you also offer healing to that person. Whether he accepts it or not is not your concern.

And by some magic, you don’t only heal yourself and the other person. You also heal all your loved ones.


Forgiveness Heals Everyone In Your Life


This is the ultimate reason why we forgive: Because even if we sin against God, He still forgives us. We don’t deserve His love, but He loves us anyway.

Heal yourself, my friend.

Forgive anyone who has wronged you.


RELATIONSHIP REBORN PART 4

SERVICE


Is Your Love Genuine Or Fake?

LOVE MEANS DIRTY HANDS NOT BEATING HEARTS..

When you hear the word "Love", what images come to your mind? candle light dinners? Kisses under the moonlight?
Well this wil change you mind.

There are five big difference between LOVE and INFATUATION.

Spot The Difference

Let me now share five clear-as-daylight differences between Infatuation and Real Love:

1. Infatuation doesn’t require a decision. It just happens. You see a girl and boom—your hormones kick in and you want her. You don’t know why. It’s her dress. It’s the way her hair falls on her shoulder. It’s her smile. It’s the way she bites her fingernail. That’s why I said that pirated versions are free. But Real Love doesn’t just happen; Real Love requires a decision. That’s why Scott Peck says Real Love can only start after one has “fallen out of love.”

2. Infatuation, no matter what you do, lasts only for a season. You have these feelings of love swirling within you until something happens that breaks the spell. Maybe she’ll open her mouth. Maybe she’ll reveal her fangs. Maybe she’ll pick her nose. Maybe she’ll spend your money. Maybe she’ll introduce you to her mother. Maybe she gains 30 pounds. It could be anything. Infatuation can last for a few days or for a couple of years. But Real Love can last forever precisely because it’s a decision.

3. Infatuation is directed towards a figment of your imagination. You’re not attracted to a real person. You’re attracted to a projection of that person from your own imagination. Like Infatuation itself, you’re in love with a fake. But Real Love is directed towards a real person. You now know her strengths and weaknesses, and have accepted it all.

4. Infatuation is a spontaneous collapse of your boundaries. You get lost and you merge with the other. You’re enmeshed. You can’t survive without each other. But Real Love requires strengthening of both your boundaries; You actually don’t need each other, but you choose each other because you want to serve.

5. Infatuation is all about feelings. Dubdub. Dubdub. Dubdub. Cold palms, giddy spells, dazed looks, and feet on the clouds. But Real Love is about dirty hands. You don’t have to feelanything to love. Love is a verb, not just a feeling. Love is an action, not just a state. Let me repeat my message: I believe love is about dirty hands, not beating hearts. The essence of love isn’t feelings but service. Scott Peck says it so well—the opposite of love isn’t hatred; the opposite of love is laziness.



READ MORE HERE

Your Physiology Affects Your Psychology

Here’s the thing.

I’ve found out that only mature people can love. Only mature people can do the great switcheroo when the pirated copy fails. They just pull out the genuine article.

Why? Only mature people have love within them.

Real Love has very little to do with the other person. A loving person can love because he is a loving person, not because the other person is lovable.

You may be asking me, “But Bo, is love dry? Isn’t there room for feelings?”

Of course, there is.

Here’s a secret mature people know in their hearts even if they don’t know it cognitively: Your physiology affects your psychology. Your feeling follows your action.

If we keep on doing acts of love, we increase our feelings of love. The more we “dirty our hands”, the more we find our “hearts beating” for the other.

To make this practical, let me share seven simple ways of dirtying your hands. They are

(1) Help,

(2) Prayer,

(3) Presence,

(4) Touch,

(5) Words,

(6) Gifts,

and

(7) Boundaries.


1. Help

Love means giving practical help.

If you’re a mother, I’m sure there are days when you wake up feeling blue and you don’t want to enter the kitchen. But fifteen minutes later, where are you? Cooking in the kitchen, because some little people will get hungry. You don’t feel like doing it. But you do it anyway. That’s love.



2. Prayer

Love means praying for your loved ones.

Perhaps your father was a horrible man. And you hate him. But you decide to pray for him.

Sooner or later, God will answer your prayer. God will change him, but He’ll change you first. Your father gets blessed, but you get blessed too. Ultimately, you become a more loving person.

You pray whether you feel like it or not.

That’s love.


3. Presence

Love means spending time together.

Not just being physically together, but also being emotionally together.

That could mean a father playing with his kids. Or a daughter visiting her aging parents. Or siblings going shopping together. Or friends laughing over pizza. Or a couple taking a walk.

There’ll be times when you won’t feel like bonding together.

But you do it anyway. That’s love.


4. Touch

Love means physical affection.

One day, a couple walking to work noticed a man passionately kissing a woman. “Why don’t you do that?” said the wife.

“Honey,” replied her husband, “I don’t even know that woman!”

People aren’t machines. They need to be touched. Holding hands, pats on the back, shoulder rubs, hugs, and kisses nourish and heal people more than you can possibly imagine.

Again, there’ll be days when you don’t want to kiss or hold hands or hug. But you do it anyway. That’s love.


5. Words

Love means verbal or written expressions.

When was the last time you told your husband, “Thank you for working so hard for our family”? When was the last time you told your wife, “Thank you for being a great mother to our kids”? When was the last time you told your mother, “Thanks for serving me all these years”? And when was the last time you actually said, “I love you”?

You might argue with me and say, “Bo, I don’t want to be a hypocrite. When I say it, I must feel it.”

Here’s my question: Are you just your emotions?

Or are you much more than your emotions? Are you also your spirit, your soul, your mind, your imagination, your will?



6. Gifts

Love means giving tokens—or symbols of love.

To you, your gift may mean nothing. But to another person, a small, inexpensive gift from you could mean the world.



7. Boundaries

Love means respecting the boundaries of the other.

Love means giving space to the other and letting the other person grow on her own. Love also means letting the other face her own responsibilities.

I like it when my wife goes out with her girlfriends each week. I like it when she takes up other interests. I like it when she grows and flourishes as an individual. I like it when she tells me, “Bo, I need some alone time. I’ll just go window shopping for awhile.” So I pray over her, “Lord, I claim in faith that she’ll be faithful to those words, that she will indeed go ‘window’ shopping only. Thank you, Lord, for this miracle!”


Love Is Service....


Love is simply done, day in and day out.

Because it’s eternal.

Constant.

Faithful.

It was Mother Teresa who said, “Service is a fruit of love”.

If you love, you will serve.